Antonio’s Lihim that you don’t really wanna care to find out.
Because, like every other confused 15 year old, he’s not a regular confused 15 year old. At least not in the stereotypical philippine cinema.
Ang Lihim ni Antonio
Director: Joselito Altarejos
Writer: Lex Bonife
WARNING! SPOILERS AHEAD.
My film appreciation professor in college once told us that, of all the ways you can execute a film, having an omnipresent narrator might just propel your film into the lowest. Why? Because what’s the use of having people acting in the film if you’re letting the narator tell all that they’re feeling anyway?
So you couple it with a rather tragic ending, and this is what you get: your usual, stereotypical filipino film. And it doesn’t help that they were trudging a rather diverse topic either–there has to be blood, oh yes. We are all fans of telenovela killings, aren’t we?
And there goes Jay Altarejos’ Ang Lihim ni Antonio (Antonio’s Secret), which made its X Rated Premier at University of the Philippines Cine Adarna on February 9, 2008. The hype of being the most courageous gay film to date and receiving a great response from the film community has sparked the curiosity of all those who are interested, be it you’re into films, queer films, or queers. Ika nga ni Lex Bonife, [ito'y] para sa mga bakla, mga nagmamahal ng bakla, at nalilibugan sa mga bakla. Oooh. Let’s see, let’s see.
The film starts with a day in a season in the life of Antonio, played by newcomer Kenji Garcia: he’s 15, and like every other 15 year old, he poses the existential question of our reason for being. He wanders around Marikina (the bicycle friendly city–or so says a poster he passes by. And you’ll see a lot of bicycle rides around here as well, whether you like it or not) and his mind does the same, asking whether before people are born, if we get to choose who we get to become. Because it’s a whole lot easier it seems, if we at least get to choose who we want to be.
He stops at a computer shop and here we meet the rest of the other players in his life: there’s his best friend, Mike (Jiro Manio), along with another close friend Nathan (I didn’t get his name, sorry) who was tagged to be “mahilig magbasa ng bible, pero malibog (a fervent reader of the bible, but too sensual)”. His mother Tere (Shamaine Buencamino) comes in and reminds him of his promise to go to the market with her, and just as they were about to leave, Antonio’s father calls up and the viewers are shown a common family situation almost too familiar that it makes you understand them before they even explain further–we are then expecting a money-uptight mother making up for an absentee father working abroad and a son who’s diligent but would forever rant about his father’s absence.
And so goes the life of young Antonio. His mother tries to teach him life by being a stern doting mother that she is, however, this isn’t enough for Antonio’s inner conflicts. Curiosity takes him to a make-out encounter with Nathan and eventually ruins their friendship; worse, an uncle from the province arrives and stays at their place–Tito Jonbert (Josh Ivan Morales), who’s preparing to leave the country for an overseas job–and he then becomes the ultimate affection of his sexual distraction. He tries to sort himself out with Mike’s candid approaches at his sexuality, and for a time, this seems to settle the young protagonist. However, after some turn of events one breakfast, while Antonio tries to give a bored Jonbert an oral job, the latter insists on anal sex and forces himself on a traumatized Antonio–which, after another bad turn of events for his mother, comes home broken hearted after learning her husband has another family abroad, and finds her nephew raping her unico ijo. One anger piling up after the other, she picks up a knife and stabs the offender, ultimately killing Jonbert. Antonio, taking on his mother’s crime, admits to killing his uncle and brings with his 15 year old body a trauma that lasts a lifetime.
On a lighter side of things, although Lihim may not have hit the extraordinary scale, it can be commended for its relatable characters. Antonio’s player may have been a newbie in film aspects, but his character was played to be somewhat charming and understandable for a 15 year old confused boy. He was able to execute the idea of being genuinely lost and tragically broken, and was maybe complemented by the characters supported by veterans Buencamino and Manio. It was a perfect balance for an indie film; in fact, maybe it’s the characters that stick to you that makes the film endearing.
However, that’s where its weakness show: the characters may have been understandable, but the story and execution of plots have failed. While Lihim has caught viewers with the trailer tagline of “Naaalala mo pa ba nung 15 anyos ka?” and you almost nod, in the end, you realize that no, this is not how you were at fifteen, and neither do you have these traumatic endings at 15. If you were a child star and had alternate movie lives in the Filipino industry, oh yes, you WOULD definitely have this ending. While all this time you marvel at young Antonio’s attempts at searching for answers, you feel disappointed and maybe even wonder whether it just has to be that his dna would also be laced with such tragedies .
Ultimately, the question would be: was it needed? Maybe, like the improperly placed scenarios all around the film which queue you in for the possible ending, it isn’t. Like when Antonio asked his mother if rape’s possible with males, he gets raped in the end. When he narrates about how he was named after Antonio De Padua, patron saint of the lost, we know what the blatant symbolism meant. When a distraught unknown and unrelated woman comes out of the blue and wishes she has killed her husband instead for catching him cheating on her, Tere consoles her and suddenly, you know what will happen. And you anticipate it with a tinge of regret that it has to happen that way: suddenly, the rest of the movie’s just a series of long clips killing your time.
The film also needed to work on better editing. Again, there were a lot of scenes that were not needed, and killed too much time. Case point, Antonio’s first attempt at Nathan. It took him too long that it was no longer exciting but aganozing to sit and wait for things to happen. How about that scene where Antonio jacks off while sniffing Jonbert’s undewear? As much as it was admirable for Garcia to take off his trousers and show him playing with his penis to complement the movie’s attempts at being bold, it was not needed. Either that, or the film failed to show Garcia in a light where he should seem sincerely turned on. He wasn’t. It didn’t show his hesitation and guilt for masturbating to a used underwear, it didn’t seem that he was eager to do what he was about to do. He seemed robotic, and it was ruined further when he pulled his trousers. It was too planned, it became fake.
What could have been made nice was ruined by raw, careless writing. It would have been easier to contend with but given that the way the film was shot with one-run shooting with barely the cuts and mostly shaky hands gave you a nausea just right after walking out of the cinema–you wonder if it’s the film, or it’s the preachy, messed-up story. Admittedly we expected a lot, and even gave so much leeway. We tried to understand whether if we were gay guys as well it would make a world of a difference. We tried to see it beyond male nakedness and hard-ons. But no. I’m a girl and I related to Antonio, but only to his own conflicts and not the other artificial endings. Antonio would have been brought home to our hearts–but stereotypical pinoy tragedy’s honestly scaring the hell out of me. So up until they come up with a better Antonio in the philippine cinema, I won’t be bringing with me any relatable characters, no matter how endearing they can get. And that, if you think about it, is a real tragedy.
Rating: B-
other reviews:
http://wanderingcommuter.blogspot.com/2008/02/film-spoiler-lihim-ni-antonio.html
http://jhed.asteeg.net/2008/02/07/ang-lihim-ni-antonio-a-shocking-revelation/
http://www.pep.ph/guide/1585/Ang-Lihim-ni-Antonio-showcases-the-anatomy-of-desire-and-longing
Additional: If I remember it right, this film should debut at Robinson’s Indie Cine TODAY, February 13, 2008. Expect an edited version, but watch it nevertheless. Then let’s sit down and talk about your thoughts after watching it. I’ll buy you coffee.

